Britney Spears' Virgin Again

Britney Spears, who claimed virginity up through her marriage to ex-husband Kevin Federline, has publically declared that she is once again a virgin. Stating that she is chaste, moral, and pure in her life and not a "skanky ho," Spears said that she has once again returned to a state of virginity.

In a statement, the pop tart said, "Madonna has been saying that she is like a virgin for a really long time. If she is, then so am I!"

When told that virginity is a one time condition that goes away the first time one has coitus or intercourse, Spears said. "Oh, good. I thought it had something to do with sex and my thingie down there. I've never had any interwhatever and I know that I don't have cooties!"

Source: The Spoof